October

by Jonah Myers

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1.
hi this is just a quick note to say it's gonna be okay okay? i have no qualifications i have no authority i have no rational argument to make but still, it's gonna be okay
2.
audrey 02:12
audrey's looking at me audrey's looking at me tell me, tell me what she sees i wonder what she thinks of me she could probably beat me in a fight but i’ve got better things to do tonight don’t let me interrupt your plans you had tonight i can just stand here, being weird and don’t let me remind you not to remember to think of me i will just stand here, being weird plants look good to me planets in my dreams tell me what it is you see tell me what it is you see in the distance all the worlds collide in the friction something different hides don’t let me interrupt your plans you had tonight i can just stand here, being weird and don’t let me remind you not to remember to think of me i will just stand here, being weird
3.
ghost cars 01:46
ghost cars in the window water on the road chasing dim reflections into the unknown forget the destination i’m just playing games this new situation will never be the same i could get sad today but i’ll do it in an honest way and if i go insane let me do it in an honest way ghost cars in the window i am holding back don’t know how to open can’t admit the lack i am not the author i am dust and sand but i am also deeper than i could understand
4.
coming down off the clouds why’s the music so loud cafe tvs and poker machines why’ve you gotta ruin all my dreams she makes me coffee she makes me tea she makes me happy i wouldn’t be who i am without her so i sing about her love who am i without her i don’t care do the dishes, one at a time if you just do one of them, that’s fine you could take a month to clean your room sometimes all you can do is all you can do i sit beside myself and i say it’s okay i pat my shoulder and walk away i don’t know who i am without her so i sing about her love who am i without her i don’t know/care i don't know/care i don't know/care i don't know/care
5.
Attention 02:57
you could talk me out of anything talk me out, and talk me back in if i tune you out, and do something else what will you do with yourself? (what are you doing here?) i think i took a right turn you’ll never guess what i learned (don’t be so insincere) this whole thing is jacked (you’re taking a dangerous tack) i want my attention back i have no interest in more late nights doing things we both know i don’t like i don’t exist to make you rich so leave me the hell alone (bitch) (what are you doing here?) i think i took a right turn you’ll never guess what i learned (don’t be so insincere) this whole thing is jacked (you’re taking a dangerous tack) i’m taking my attention back taking control of your attention is a rebellion in a time when an hour of your life is a commodity that’s prized above the mental health of children and the privacy of millions, i’m not trying to be a fundamentalist, i’m just thinking is it possible that monetising outrage is connected to the severity and the prevalence of anxiety and depression? can we optimise the algorithm for contentment instead of just squeezing out attention while we empty our heads?
6.
bank account 02:13
i've got a headache today and not much i'm wanting to say just the dull and mild pain of something off inside my brain are you gonna be here for dinner? do you wanna get takeaway? you gotta just keep your chin up even when it's all mundane i am who i am i've got a bank account, and ruined plans i wear my socks inside, and sometimes forget i'm gonna die i wanna make things right, and i really try i'm feeling down, but i gotta remind myself to ride it out back and forth, in and out of the darkness, that's what it's about are you gonna be round tomorrow? did you remember to check the mail? have you got a ruler i could borrow? have you got plans for the day? i am who i am i've got a bank account, and ruined plans i wear my socks inside, and sometimes forget i'm gonna die i wanna make things right, and i really try
7.
when you get what you want you want something else you wanna blame somebody, but you do this to yourself if you think about a kid at christmas there's pleasure, which is when he gets the christmas presents, right? (opens the christmas presents) and there's enjoyment, which is when she's excited about christmas coming what can be sustained is joy (what can be sustained is joy) what can be sustained is joy if you wanna live part of you has to die this is Planet Paradox in dark and beautiful night if you think about a kid at christmas there's pleasure, which is when he gets the christmas presents, right? (opens the christmas presents) and there's enjoyment, which is when she's excited about christmas coming what can be sustained is joy (what can be sustained is joy) what can be sustained is joy
8.
blinkers 02:17
i can't imagine a world where our cities are forgotten sinking down into the dirt cause i have blinkers on don't wanna give up all my comforts to live more responsibly good lord, what a mess we've made of this beautiful, beautiful place good lord, what a mess we've made better hope it's not too late i don't think we should give up there is value and there's meaning in sticking round and cleaning up and even though it's cliché each of us can take a little step forwards in our own small way good lord, what a mess we've made of this beautiful, beautiful place good lord, what a mess we've made better hope it's not too late
9.
i don’t wanna steal any more wishes from stars or dandelions i’m sure they’ve got enough to deal with you can cut the atmosphere with scissors and escape into the night just let us know if you miss us i feel cocky enough to fall apart she lives in a palace, but the queen still farts do i make you uncomfortable? is this even fun for you? can we quantify it with tables, graphs and charts? there’s a girl who sits there every day waits and waits and waits she’s wishing on flowers, stars and rain you can’t imagine how things change and no matter what they say there’s a thousand million ways to pray i feel cocky enough now to fall apart she lives in a palace, but the queen still farts do i make you uncomfortable? is this even fun for you? can we quantify it with tables, graphs and charts? just try to remember that everything’s art i don’t wanna steal any more wishes from stars or dandelions i’m sure they’ve got enough to deal with you can cut the atmosphere with scissors and escape into the night just let us know if you miss us
10.
the paintbrush was angry at the colour that the artist chose to use love one another, unless someone has Bad Views there are no heroes in a punk rock band just fill my head with rocks and fill the rocks with sand love is not like pizza love is not like dirt love is just a feeling we all have for David Byrne it's always five o'clock somewhere except when it's not i'm sorry for what i said before about punk rock say, i could be a lot of help to you, sam here's my latest invention, right here a camera with a keyhole lens takes pictures right through doors i've been kicked outta five hotels already! how bout it, sam? can i go to work for ya? just give me a simple yes or no No. aw, but that's too simple why don't you give it a little thought?
11.
stressed and anxious stressed and anxious stressed and anxious stressed and anxious stressed and anxious stressed and anxious stressed and anxious stressed and anxious i don't feel very good my brain feels like it's made of wood i wasted so much time i could have spent on this both my shoulders are real tense and there's a tightness in my chest it's very physiologically unpleasant stressed and anxious stressed and anxious stressed and anxious stressed and anxious it seems to be useful to try and describe whatever feelings you have inside the act of observing gives you distance from the pain you might remember time is fake and love is real, so try to take your anxious feelings with a grain of salt
12.
note to self: don't watch the news and don't read it either the best news is clouds and living creatures another note to self: don't read the comments and don't google it if you wanna be angry just find somewhere to sit
13.
i’ve got a feeling i couldn’t describe if i tried it’s like i’m bursting open while staying inside i think i’m still dealing with being in my mind i think i’m still reeling from being alive but i can’t complain, cause God’s run out of complaint forms i don’t want miracles anymore the same way i don’t want atoms why bother wishing for what you’re already made of? i’m gonna find my nightmares and give them a home they’re only nightmares cause they’ve been alone i’m getting better at remembering that and i’m gradually starting to wear a new hat the hat’s a metaphor but i’m not sure exactly what for i don’t want miracles anymore the same way i don’t want atoms why bother wishing for what you’re already made of? and i don’t want certainty anymore i just wanna explore (i just wanna explore)
14.
care 02:20
we won’t be here much longer it’s gonna be all right and i can see that you’re doing your best so take it one day at a time i’ll take care of you i’ll take care of you it’s what i’m here to do you’re not short on love and you are strong enough just hold on, and when you listen to this song i hope it holds you very close and makes you smile i’ll take care of you i’ll take care of you it’s what i’m here to do
15.
i spent time in my room with the blinds closed i felt blind to my youth with the nights cold wept silent at noon with the lights low but then winter was through with a sigh, and a the sun's come out now remember what it's all about well don't worry 'bout the holes in your jeans don't worry 'bout the recipes oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh it's okay to sit down and take your socks off do nothing for a moment you don't have to prove you exist, no you don't have to prove that you exist the sun will come out, now just remember what it's all about don't worry 'bout the holes in your jeans don't worry 'bout the recipes oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh
16.
Overmorrow 02:08
out of my window i see the future i can’t explain it but it’s here don’t wake me up tomorrow and don’t wait too long to go step into sunshine take five deep breaths we’re in october, still alive don’t wake me up tomorrow and don’t wait too long to go
17.
i grind up my dreams and i put them in a salt shaker it’s easier to get through customs that way behind the scenes, we know we’re all fooling each other that’s just how we get through the day i’m not about to shoot my shot the meaning comes, whether you like it or not i’m not about to shoot my shot the meaning comes, whether you like it or not and time just keeps on going, doesn’t care an arrow pointing everywhere an arrow pointing everywhere an arrow pointing everywhere an arrow pointing everywhere an arrow pointing everywhere i’m not about to shoot my shot the meaning comes, whether you like it or not and time just keeps on going, doesn’t care an arrow pointing everywhere
18.
i put my face up to the aquarium glass see the fishes swimming round in the dark if they don't wanna leave, i guess they're free but i can't help thinking they should be in the sea and if i tell you we're free, what do you think that means and if i'm dancing all night i'm confused that you're still surprised i'm giving up, giving in i'll stop trying to ruin everything why wouldn't i want to celebrate that? i'm taking messages, pretending to nod faking pessimism so they give me a job got a bachelor degree in pretending to read so i think i'm ready if you're ready to leave and if i tell you we're free, what do you think that means and if i'm dancing all night i'm confused that you're still surprised i'm giving up, giving in i'll stop trying to ruin everything why wouldn't i want to celebrate that?
19.
Falling Out 02:19
whoa oh oh, what do you wanna know (whoa oh oh, where do you wanna go) i’m falling out of my skin trying to please you (i never thought i could be so see-through) please don’t remind me how much i want you back again please don’t pretend you don’t see me trying to self-reinvent whoa oh oh, tell me how do it wrong (whoa oh oh, we’re never gonna get along) i’m falling out of my scene, trying to dream good (i’m burning up, burning up the driftwood) it’s getting better now getting better now it’s getting better now getting so much better somehow please don’t remind me i used to waste my time on you and please don’t pretend you don’t wish i never made it through
20.
i like watering plants in the sun taking my time, one by one i like looking at the river flow past when everything's green and the birdsong i like going to the beach with the dog greeting each stranger with a friendly nod i like clouds and coffee and scones and i like it when you along whoa oh oh oh-oh-oh oh love everybody when you cross the road whoa oh oh oh-oh-oh oh water your plants and the plants will grow i like thinking about planets and stars organic meals and electric cars i don't like thinking about who i'd be if i didn't have you here next to me you make the meaning shine out of my life you make my shitty days all right i really really really like that whoa oh oh oh-oh-oh oh love everybody when you cross the road whoa oh oh oh-oh-oh oh water your plants and the plants will grow whoa oh oh oh-oh-oh oh love everybody cause you never know whoa oh oh oh-oh-oh oh water your plants till we all come home
21.
don’t believe everything you hear people are complex, and lost and weird contradiction and paradox doublethink, it is, it’s not waking up in a different world different problems, but it’s still absurd i keep on walking, walking on i don’t need you to hear my songs
22.
i fell for her when i was fourteen she was everything to me i’d stop to talk on the way to catch the bus always walked the way that took me past you might have been in love but you just weren’t brave enough the timing wasn’t right and i was blinded by the light i got obsessed and strangled by my dreams endless texts in circles and caffeine we made each other jealous, then moved on till all the love was gone we might have been in love but it’s over and it’s done and i wonder did you leave or is it still what you believe i hope you’re doing well and looking after yourself i might never see you again but it was nice to be your friend
23.
CHICKENS 02:36
i'm getting dizzy from spinning myself around trying to make the stupid fall out i'm getting busy making proper serious sounds cuz that's what it's all about, now don't count your chickens before they scratch did all the stretches, but you're still sad i got a present in the centre of my letterbox (i already have a letterbox) there was a message from the sender and a pile of rocks the message (in magenta texta) said don't count your chickens before they scratch everyone's a bit stupid, gotta live with that
24.
if you were turning in the wall of my disguise maybe you’d understand the fire in my eyes i’m moving on to something better soon i sometimes wish i weren’t the person that i am i sometimes get this funny feeling that you don’t understand me at all it’s ok it's all right i feel strange all night deep breaths at first light i feel strange all night so i’ll be turning up the friction on the dial and i might be leaving sydney for a while maybe my whole life i’ve got a bunch of other stuff i wanna do and i’ve got very little time to spend with you i’m only just getting started it’s ok it's all right i feel strange all night deep breaths at first light i feel strange all night
25.
i’m in the kitchen i’m in the kitchen i wanna make brownies i wanna make brownies i’m in the kitchen i’m in the kitchen i wanna make brownies i wanna make brownies ingredients: 140 grams of butter one and a quarter cups of sugar a bit more than a cup of cocoa powder and a pinch or two of salt you’re gonna need two large eggs half a teaspoon of vanilla extract half a cup of plain, plain flour now this shouldn’t take you more than an hour i’m in the kitchen i’m in the kitchen making some brownies yeah, making some brownies line a baking tray with paper or grease preheat the oven to 163 degrees (celsius) melt the butter with the cocoa, then you add the sugar and salt if you forget to add vanilla before you add eggs, it doesn’t matter but it’s your fault i’m in the kitchen i’m in the kitchen, gonna sift in flour and mix it with some power put it in the tray and put it in the oven for half an hour and that’s how you make brownies that’s how you make brownies and make sure you clean up after yourself
26.
unique 03:06
it's your time to shine but just fall in line you're no more unique than anyone else they tell you lies and sell you things you don't need you are just fine how you are there is nothing new except being you you're no less unique than anyone else they tell you lies and sell you things you don't need you are just fine how you are
27.
Unstoppable 03:12
don't mind me, i'm gonna be right here trying to work out how to disappear i don't know you; i won't you show you round ignorance is just the sweetest of sounds, oh how how do you make my life so beautiful? i wanna make the whole world know about my love and if you just stay a while, we could be unstoppable we won't be around forever but we're gonna be around together we're gonna make the world a little better, you and me i've got reasons to be out of my mind sometimes it's easy but sometimes it's hard to be kind hard to unwind but you still make my life so beautiful i wanna make the whole world know about my love and if you just wait a while, we're gonna be unstoppable we won't be around forever but we're gonna be around together we can make the world a little better, you and me
28.
i’ve got a home i’ve got a home i’m not alone i’m not alone i feel better i feel better i feel better right now it’s been hard for a while it’s been hard sometimes to smile i need space i need air and now it’s everywhere i feel better i feel better i feel better right now i feel better i feel better i feel better right now
29.
there’s a fly buzzing round the room again and the drip, drip, drip of a tap green algae in the pool again i think, think, think it’s time for a nap oh oh, darling don’t be unkind oh oh, this isn’t the best time oh oh, so many things to do but i’m gonna do them, i’ll do them with you i’m so tangled up inside myself i don’t believe things i know are true i’m so astounded by my ignorance and i feel smart because i know it too oh oh, darling don’t be unkind oh oh, i'm having the best time oh oh, so many things to do but i’m gonna do them, i’ll do them with you oh oh, darling don’t be unkind oh oh, this isn’t the best time oh oh, so many things to do but i’m gonna do them, i’ll do them, i'll do them with you (darling don't be unkind) with you (we're having the best time) with you (so many things to do) with you (but i'm gonna do them, i'll do them with you)
30.
i kicked a cricket on accident (it was an accident) i thought it was a twig but it might have been a carcass (already dead) so then i’d be okay so then i’d be okay don’t blame me, don’t make signs go home and waste your time new morning new morning new morning new morning
31.
happy here 02:26
i’m not too sure what i got here for what did i do to deserve this what did i do to deserve such a beautiful place and such a beautiful face to see every morning when i wake up finding different ways to love you more every day i think we’re gonna be happy here, my love i think we’re gonna be happy here i think we’re gonna be happy here i think we’re gonna be happy here, my love i think we’re gonna be happy here i think we’re gonna be happy here i think we’re gonna be happy here, my love my love

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released October 31, 2020

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Jonah Myers Australia

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